She said she felt like dying when things didn’t go exactly how she wanted. I’ve known the sister for a long time now. She always seemed like she knew her bounds; like she knew Allah ‘az wa jal. But soon, all of what was inside her would come out and no one was expecting it.
It is the fuel for An-Nafs al-Ammarah bis-soo’ (the self that is inclined to evil), and it is the disease of An-Nafs al-Mutma’innah (the self with complete rest & satisfaction).
It is Al-Hawaa.
Fatima* had been wanting to marry this brother for a long time but she was scared of what her father would say. When the day came to tell her father and he refused, her hidden shirk had become apparent. She was committing shirk Al-mahabah.
She cried until she fell asleep from exhaustion. She wanted nothing more than to die. Fatima had grown obsessed over the months and no one knew about it. She kept saying that she wants nothing more than to marry the brother.
But what about Jannah? What about seeing Allah’s face?
Fatima had been living on the edge. Not in terms of lifestyle, but the edge of the fold of Islam.
Al-Hawaa, or desires, is not something that is disliked in and of itself. But it is the extremes that become despised. In fact, because it is rare to find someone that seeks to strike a balance in his desires, Allah ‘az wa jal only mentions hawaa in the Quran when He dispraises it. And there are only very few instances in the sunnah when the term is used in a positive manner.
Sisters tend to over think and over analyze situations. It’s in our nature. And truly that is where some of the dangers of shirk al-mahabah lies. The more a person thinks about a desire, the more obsessed they become with it. And the more obsessed a person is, the more they want to break free from it but find themselves unable to do so.
Ibnul Qayyim describes this person: “He is like a bird that was deceived by a grain of wheat, neither was he able to get it, nor was he able to free himself from the trap he got caught in.”
Perhaps the most profound statement in all of Imam Ibnul Qayyim’s chapter on the dispraise of Al-Hawaa was the anaology he used when describing how man can be more astray than animals when it comes to desire, as Allah ‘az wa jal says in surat Al-Furqaan:
Have you (O Muhammad SAW) seen him who has taken as his ilah (god) his own desire? Would you then be a Wakeel (a disposer of his affairs or a watcher) over him?
Or do you think that most of them hear or understand? They are only like cattle; nay, they are even farther astray from the Path. (i.e. even worst than cattle).
To which imam Ibnul Qayyim said, “An animal takes a share of enjoyment in the taste of food, drinks, and sexual relations that is not attainable by man, and that it lives a comfortable life free from thought and worry. Hence it is driven to its slaughtering place preoccupied with its lusts due to the lack of knowledge about the consequences.” (Whereas man is given reason and intellect therefore man follows his desires to his doom, and is therefore even more astray than cattle.)
Hawaa linguistically means fell down. And the one who indulges in their desires in excess of what is desired by Allah, is only preparing himself to fall on his face.
I am given the opportunity to teach sisters, the youth, at our masjid. And one common thread is the reality of sisters and their obsessions. And the dangers of shirk al-mahabah are very real and very common. And although most people don’t realize it that they have elements of it. I realized that weakness in a person’s iman can be caused by this type of shirk, because the heart wants and yearns for other than Allah, thus causing a person to be unhappy and ultimately lowering their iman.
I’m sure many of you reading this know a case of someone who has gone crazy over another person, or “can’t live without” a certain food or drink to the extent that it not only makes their soul sick, but also their body.
Let every person look to his or her heart to see if this is the case with them. And know that it can all be solved with the help of Allah ‘az wa jal– by getting closer to him and distancing yourself enough from that which you love, whether that be food, drink or love.
Just a friendly reminder. Wallahu alem.
—————————————————————————
*real name not used.
For more on the topic of Al-Hawaa, please read “A chapter on The Dispraise of Al-Hawaa (Desire)” By Imam Ibnul Qayyim, prepared by sheik Saleh As-Saleh, rahmitullahi 3alayhom.
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July 16th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
Subhanullah,
a powerful reminder!
Maybe you could summarize your halaqa to the sisters in your area, and post notes online. I’m sure there are many who benefit, including brothers, so they can understand their own problems with “Hawaa” and to also understand their sisters, so they can help the situation.
July 16th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
excellent reminder…
jazaks sis
July 16th, 2008 at 5:18 pm
Subhan’Allah!
La hawla wa quwatta illah billah, this is a very powerful reminder.
Jazakillahu khayr Shirien.
If you do post up the notes, which i think is a brilliant idea then please do post them as i could utilise them in my community.
July 16th, 2008 at 11:27 pm
MashAllah, you sound like a life coach! An amazing Muslim one
I think also if the ultimate level of love is the ability to set someone (or something) free, then what remains? Where do we derive the strength to continue on, on our own?
“Oh, Prophet! Sufficient for you is Allah, and for those who follow you among the Believers” (Qur’an 8:64)
Hasbunna Allah wa’ne’ma Alwakeel.
July 17th, 2008 at 1:42 am
inshaallah when i get back from Masr, when i give the lessons inshaallah i’ll summarize here. Barak Allahu feekom.
there are a lot of issues with sisters that people tend to forget, and one of those things is that we act with emotion a lot of the time. whether when we’re angry or we act because we love a certain person or thing. And subhanallah when someone understands that, they understand some of the rulings Allah ‘az wa jal lays down in the Quran with regard to women.
brothers need to understand that girls over analyze everything, and if there is one thing that is said nice to a sister, she may think about that a lot and obsess over it. So it’s important to keep within the bounds.
I’ve gotten into arguments with my sisters before because they would say something and i would over analyze it and then blow up on them.
actually i still do so,(Sorry D.) so i exceeded the amount of anger that was allowed for me. which is the anger that is dispraised.
So if one of my sisters for instance gives me naseeha, i generally take it and respect her opinion a lot… but then i start to think that she thinks im a horrible person when in fact it’s because she cares and sees a lot of potential in me that she gives me that naseeha.
how does this relate to shirk Al-mahhabah? I’m just laying out why it’s so easy for a girl to fall into this (and how it is easy to fall in excess with regard to anger). We sit there and think deeply about every little thing that happened or thing that was said… and when it comes to loving an actual person… the love itself is permitted.. it’s the excess that is dispraised.
People in general are OK until something bad happens, which reveals what’s in their heart. they may not know that they have these symptoms of this disease.. but if you find yourself thinking more about a person more than you think about Allah. Then know that you are crossing dangerous territory.
and if one thing goes wrong, they may turn to kufr because of that long period of time in which they detached their heart from Allah.
wallahu alem.
it’s a great book, i recommend everyone to read it. full of gems.
July 17th, 2008 at 1:56 am
Heba,
jazaki Allahu khairan,
One thing i never understood was the concept of “loving to set someone free”
I’m not quite sure what that means. Free from what? I understand the overall point and completely agree with you.
after all getting married is completely only HALF your deen.
I find that people in general feel before marriage that their life will “complete” after marriage. And it’s smooth sailing in terms of your deen from there (because you are marrying someone with similar mentality that also helps you become better.)
I’m not married but I also realize that the reality is that that’s only half of it. You dont rely on an individual completely to help you become a better person. It’s only Allah that will help you and you have to also work on your other half.
wallahu alem.
im sure many of the people married here would say that marriage put them behind bars, not set them free ;).
July 17th, 2008 at 3:41 am
Assalamualaikum,
MashAllah nice job! May Allah reward you for this reminder, reward Fatima for coming to her senses and reward anyone involved and reminding her about Allah…
An Ayah that explicitly explains this is -
And of mankind are some who take (for worship) others besides Allah as rivals (to Allah). They love them as they love Allah. But those who believe, love Allah more (than anything else). If only, those who do wrong could see, when they will see the torment, that all power belongs to Allah and that Allah is Severe in punishment. [al-Baqarah 2:165]
When people fall into Shirk al-Mahabbah, they are guilty of taking a “nid” (i.e. a rival with Allah).
Falling in love is not something that is Haraam as long as it doesn’t turn into Shirk al-Mahabbah. But unfortunately when the word “love” is mentioned, people think of Romeo & Juliet.
We see sisters who are “madly in love” with some brother and come to us “please by my wali and get us married”, many times they do not realize what to even look for in a man. The same goes for brothers who are supposedly in love with some beautiful sister over the net and wants to marry her.
Love that is praised is the love that draws you closer to Allah. Marriage is half of our Deen [(or Half of Emaan) as reported in the Hadeeth in Ahmad], so how can someone destroy HALF of his/her Deen by ending up (loving) someone who will not be able to raise the level of the person’s Emaan through patient reminders and teachings? We all know the Hadeeth how the Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam mentioned if a righteous man with good manners come, don’t refuse [in Tirmidhi]. Think deeply about it. It is only the Saalih who will guard his wife like a true sheppard is supposed to guard his sheep from the wolves (i.e. shaytaan) and it is only a well mannered man who will patiently keep teaching her and understand her short comings.
Marriage puts some people “behind bars” because they do not look for what the Messenger told them to look for…because they don’t love purely for Allah’s Sake…because they don’t follow the Sunnah at home, etc.
The reminder you gave is very good, especially for our dear sisters who are blown off their feet very easily just because some guy sweet talks to them and likes the same colors & ice cream as them. Here’s how Allah defines a “real man” -
Men whom neither trade nor sale diverts them from the Remembrance of Allah (with heart and tongue), nor from establishing Salat, nor from giving the Zakat. They fear a Day when hearts and eyes will be overturned. [Noor 24:37]
When you do happen to find such a man, by all means marry him and fall in love (loving what pleases Allah) because this is the husband who will assist you in attaining Jannah by being firm on Tawheed & the authentic Sunnah…
‘Abdullah ibn ‘Abbas said: Whoever loves for the sake of Allah and hates for the sake of Allah, and befriends for the sake of Allah and shows enmity for the sake of Allah, would get Allah’s Friendship. Without abiding by this, no one can get the real taste of Emaan, though he may have been a frequent offerer of Prayers and Fasting. Today people keep relationship, and love only for some worldly reason but this will not provide them any benefit on the Day of Judgment. [this hadeeth is mentioned in the Tafseer of the verse 2:165 in Tafsir at-Tabari]
Jazak Allah Khair,
July 17th, 2008 at 11:07 am
Shirien i was wondering if you could give some more examples where sisters/brothers give into their Hawaah, so we could avoid this trait as much as possible.
Where individuals obsess as its not visible at all times and you do it without realising.
Not specific but on a general level.
Jazaki Allahu khayr
PS. lol, i read em all : ) alHamdulillah.
July 18th, 2008 at 2:02 am
Alima,
in general when someone gives into their hawaa and goes beyond the limits, it’s obvious because it over steps the bounds of Allah.
And that’s because sins originate from following desires.
however, if you are speaking more about shirk al-mahhabah and how to do you if you are close or not, then wallahu alem.
Ibnul Qayyim explains the 4 types of Love:
“And there are four types of Love which one must separate and explain. Those who have fallen into misguidance are unable to distinguish between them;
“The first division is Mahabat Allaah (Love of Allaah (swt)). This type of love is not sufficient to save oneself from the Hellfire nor from the Punishment of Allaah (swt). It is also not enough to attain the happiness of the reward in the Here After. This is because the Mushrikeen, the Jews, the worshippers of the Cross (Christians) amongst others claim this love to Allaah (swt).
“The second division is Mahabah Ma Yuhib Allaah (Loving what Allaah (swt) loves). This is the type of love which if manifest, makes one enter Islaam and leave the Kufr (disbelief) darkness they were in. The ones whom Allaah (swt) loves are those who establish this love and are definite in it.
“The third division is Al-Hub Lillaah Wa Feehi (The love for Allaah (swt) and the love for the sake of Allaah (swt)). This type of love is necessary for all those who wish to love Allaah (swt). The love cannot become complete unless one loves Allaah (swt) and loves for Allaah’s (swt) sake.
“The fourth division is Al-Hub Ma’a Allaah (The love with Allaah (swt)). This type of love is the Shirk (associating) type of love. Any person who loves anything in association to Allaah (swt) and not for Allaah (swt) exclusively, nor for the sake of Allaah (swt) has made a competitor with Allaah (swt) and this is only the love of the Mushrikeen (idolators).”
and from my own observation:
as for sisters and their over-analyzing that can lead to the fourth type of love, in general sisters usually like to think a lot about the subject of marriage and they love to talk about it a lot. and when there is a particular individual to fit in their talk about marriage, that’s where an obsession can originate.
usually it starts out with the sister thinking about it on her own at home, then she’ll tell her friends, and then every time she sees those friends she’ll talk about it and they too will ask her if there was anything new. that’s where the over-analyzing comes in. the constant thinking leads to constant coming up with different scenarios (whatever they may be)and the constant talking leads to the attachment.
that’s normal.. most sisters do it.. but a sister has to see in her heart if she is spending more time thinking about that individual than she is thinking about Allah and how to please Him (’az wa jal). And she has to see if she is exceeding the limits.
WAllahu alem, the last part is just from my own observation. I think it’s a good idea to ask someone more knowledgeable as to how to strike a balance so that we dont go in excess of our hawaa, and thus tread on a dangerous path.
but I’m sure it all has to do with the Love, Fear and Hope in Allah ‘az wa jal.
If you fear Allah, you wont exceed your limits, wallahu alem.
And if you know who Allah ‘az wa jal is, and what entails in the 3 branches of tawheed then inshaAllah it will be easier to avoid associating anything in your heart with Allah.
Wallahu alem.
Someone more knowledgeable can explain it better.
July 18th, 2008 at 8:11 am
Love is something that Allah has put in our hearts. Those who are guided by Allah in having the proper knowledge/wisdom, will know how to use this ‘gift’ from Allah in the right way.
Single brothers/sisters need to remember that they can fool their parents/siblings/friends/even the opposite person, but he/she can never fool Allah.
The Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam said: we do not know think that there is anything better for those who love one another, than marriage. [Ibn Maajah; classed as Saheeh by Albani]
Imam as-Sindi in his Sharh of Sunan Ibn Maajah said: What this means is that if there is love between two people, that love cannot be increased or made to last longer by anything like marriage. If here is marriage as well as that love, that love will increase & grow stronger everyday.
The thing that you mentioned where a sister (or a brother) sits at home and all he/she does is think about that one they love or chit chat with their friends about or talk with eachother on MSN/phone for hours…is very wrong. And when you have friends coming and asking on a regular basis “hey what’s up with you two” (almost sounds like they’re bf/gf), only adds to the problem.
We see the youth hook up under the table and “fix” their own marriage. Yeah there are many cases where parents are seeking only material gain, or do not like religious men for their daughters or may be racist/nationalist…whatever the case, it is not a valid excuse for anyone to develop these under the table relationships.
How do these youth know who to fall in love with? Do they ever consult their religious relatives? Do they consult the Imams/Du’aat of their community? Not at all. They just go on their own because the brother is flashy and has a few similarities with her. Then we see this brother who also doesn’t consult anybody but instead wants to be the hero like some Indian movie and save the girl from such “evil” parents by marrying her. This is simply ridiculous and not the love that the Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam mentioned.
There needs to be a balance in everything. Sure Allah & His Messenger gave a person the full right to marry whom they like…as long as they are upon Tawheed & Sunnah and can teach you.
Many sisters do not get this point and then create chaos for themselves at home. A wise woman will ask people around about the brother who is more knowledgable than her, ask her practicing relatives, ask the Imam, etc…ya3ni search for that brother. Check his Deen, check his knowledge, check his character…if it is praisworthy and you are ok with his short comings (because all humans have faults) then sure “like/love” this person and marry and InshAllah be happy.
There is a proper way of going about things. This way people of knowledge are aware of what is going on and can advice the youth in case he/she fails to see a major mistake in terms of Deen in the opposit person; there will be less chaos; no flirting on MSN/phone, stays Halaal and will be blessed by Allah.
And Allah knows best but it is always good for a sister to find a brother more knowledgable/praciting than her so that he can be that leader of the house and educate her (which btw, is one of the rights of the wife). But we see sisters looking for people in their level or lesser than them, and it turns out that brother instead of helping her is actually preventing her from going a step further in her Deen. And this brother is the cause for her to even fall into Shirk! How much more proof do these young people want that they made a big mistake in doing what they did?
As for brothers, if you are not patient than please don’t waste your time nor some sister’s time if she knows less than you. Because women can never be educated without having patience and you better make sure the sister really does want to learn the Truth. So many brothers fall in “love” with that beautiful girl from the net…”ah she’ll wear hijaab after marriage” and all sorts of things.
The bottom line is - love is Halaal as long as it doesn’t cross the limits set by Allah. Marry the one you like, it’s your right given by Allah & His Messenger. But love the one who fulfills the characteristics loved by Allah and who can be your best friend and aid you and him/herself to remain focused in the ultimate goal - Jannah.
July 18th, 2008 at 8:20 am
Taufique,
you said:
“The thing that you mentioned where a sister (or a brother) sits at home and all he/she does is think about that one they love or chit chat with their friends about or talk with eachother on MSN/phone for hours…is very wrong. And when you have friends coming and asking on a regular basis “hey what’s up with you two” (almost sounds like they’re bf/gf), only adds to the problem.”
that may be true that it’s wrong. but that’s the nature of girls to over think things. and it’s not necessarily that they are asking what’s new with the two of them.. most often than not it’s just asking any new updates on the “marriage situation”
i think all girls will agree with me on this one. now whether someone thinks about it all the time or not differs from girl to girl.. but yes you are right.. anything in excess is wrong and can lead to that type of shirk. wallahu alem.
but men are from mars women are from venus… it’s just the nature of girls.
July 18th, 2008 at 10:33 am
Jazakum Allahu khayrun Shirien and br Taufique for the extra expanation… It puts things is a better perspective alHamdulillah.
July 18th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
There’s nothing wrong with the friends asking what’s up in a legitimate marriage situation. We all think of that special someone to marry, as in we all have an idea on what we want from our spouse. But thinking too much about it can take someone away from the path of Allah. More importantly our idea of ideal spouse needs to match the recommendations of the Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam…that is if we truly love Allah.
Just another point, we don’t sit around and enjoy when injustice is done against some Muslim girl by her family…however there is a whole Shari’ process…be patient and follow that, Allah will surely bless things.
I actually forgot to mention what sister Alima had asked for…a general explanation how things can become Shirk al-Mahabbah.
Allah says:
Say: If your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your wives, your kindred, the wealth that you have gained, the commerce in which you fear a decline, and the dwellings in which you delight are more beloved to you than Allah and His Messenger, and striving hard in His Cause, then wait until Allah brings about His Decision (torment). And Allah guides not the people who are Al-Fasiqun (the rebellious, disobedient to Allah). [Tawbah 9:24]
So in general anything that a person loves, if it stops the person from
a) doing the obligations commanded by Allah or makes you engage in the prohibitions set by Allah
b) following the Sunnah
c) striving hard to stay on Allah’s Path…
then the person is guilty of Shirk al-Mahabbah. Also a key reminder that Al-Mahabbah is one of the conditions of Laa ilaaha ill Allah.
Another verse as the Scholars of Islam states is the proof of whether a believer truly loves Allah or not -
Say (O Muhammad SAW to mankind): “If you (really) love Allah then follow me (i.e. accept Islamic Monotheism, follow the Quran and the Sunnah), Allah will love you and forgive you of your sins. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [Ale-'Imraan 3:31]
As for sisters over thinking things, even some brothers are like that too. And unfortnately, such people tend to loose out on many good things. At the end of the day we can ask, what was the benefit of becoming paraniod?
Follow the Sunnah & have tawakkul on Allah and everything will be fine bi idhnillah.
July 19th, 2008 at 1:49 pm
this is a real life encouter for me. any advice will be appreciated:
I met this girl 2 years ago at my workplace and i got to know her and she got to know me. we both liked each other. She is bengali and i am pakistani. the thing was that when she was 16 years old she met a guy and went out with him for 3 years. he proposed and she accepted and then he ended up leaving her. well in the space of 2 years after he left we both met me. that guy has now came back and asked to marry her. the thing is that she said no in marrying him again (this time he approached the parents) and he could not accept that. he states that she belongs to him. he is not leaving her. She is now getting married to him in a couple of weeks. i must admit that things did happen between us and i do strongly repent for that. i have always tried to meet her parents, but she has never let me meet them. just a week ago i txt her and he accused her of cheating and she got battered. she doesn’t want to tell him about me beacsue it will create conflict, and i don’t blame her. i have left her to it but i find it heart breaking i must see her at my work place. the wedding is going through and i have decided to leave her to it even though i think its the wrong decision.i feel ashamed that i am a educated person form a religious background and i got myself into this situation. i have deep pain, only because we both wanted to get married but because the other person could not accept his rejection. I hope allah gives me strength and helps me! brothers and sisters i hope you learn from my experience and do things correctly as following your nafs will only lead to heart break.
July 19th, 2008 at 3:33 pm
Please don’t make this a place to come and confess sins. If somehow people find out who you are, then you would be guilty of exposing your own sins. As the Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam said: All of my Ummah will be fine except for those who commit sin openly, an example of which is a man who does something at night, and when morning comes and Allah has concealed his sin, he says, ‘O So-and-so, I did such and such yesterday.’ His Lord had covered his sin all night, but he has uncovered what Allah had concealed. [Bukhari]
So brothers & sisters, if you want to share some experience that has taught you a lesson with the intention to make others understand not to fall into them, then please make sure there is no way for someone to find out that it was actually you who had done the Major Sin.
As for your situation brother. The Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam said: the best of you are those who after committing a sin, makes Tawbah and doesn’t return to the sin. [Bukhari]
There is a difference in meaning between the word “istighfaar” (seeking forgiveness) and “tawbah” (repentance). Someone can do something and ask Allah to forgive them, but a few days/months pass by and he falls into the same sin again and this is an ongoing cycle. But when the slave of Allah makes Tawbah…he turns to Allah seeking His forgiveness and also completely gives up that sin.
Allah says:
And those who, when they have committed Fahishah (anything to do with zina) or wronged themselves with evil, remember Allah and ask forgiveness for their sins; - and none can forgive sins but Allah - And do not persist in what (wrong) they have done, while they know. [Ale- 'Imraan 3:135]
Many people get irritated when you remind them of the wrong they do and sternly reply “stop advising me because i already know”…knowing something is Haraam and still doing it is far worse than someone who is ignorant and does something. And Allah clearly says this is the condition - knowingly do not persist in any evil - And aso for those who sincerely repent, Allah says in the next verse - For such, the reward is Forgiveness from their Lord, and Gardens with rivers flowing underneath (Paradise), wherein they shall abide forever. How excellent is this reward for the (righteous) workers. [Ale-'Imraan 3:136]
So repent and remove yourself from anything that will remind you of that Major Sin again. Allah says - man has been created weak. [Nisaa' 4:28]
So if you keep lurking around that sin, or that person that reminds you of that sin…we are weak and you are only asking for trouble and keeping the door open for Shaytaan to pull you back to that sin again.
The Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam said: The Muhaajir is the one who makes Hijrah from what has been made forbidden upon him by Allah. [Bukhari]
So literally, make Hijrah …migrate away from that sin…go as far as you can and do not give any chance for Shaytaan to pull you back. The way you are talking brother, it is very clear even after this girl gets married and comes to work in the same place, you will be tempted to talk to her again. And may Allah have mercy, it can easily lead to far worse situations…
And clearly know that things ended up like this because it was never a Halaal “liking”, Major Sins were committed; you transgressed the bounds of Allah.
As your Muslim brother I am sincerely advising you - get a job in another place, asap and just leave the sight of this girl.
May Allah protect all of us from such hideous situations and help all the single Muslims to find righteous spouses soon so they do not fall into such traps of Shaytaan.
Allah Knows Best.
July 19th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
I believe the brother just put his initials for the sake of being anonymous. However, I deleted the URL with his name so that inshaAllah no one can trace it back to him (I think it was submitted by mistake).
In general I dont see that someone seeking naseeha is a bad thing. however, my advice to anyone with a specific situation is to go to their local imam or sheikh tell him the scenario and inshaAllah get naseeha from someone who both knows you and is knowlegable, wallahu alem.
May Allah ‘az wa jal make it easy for you. However, please be ware of the traps of this type of love. And InshaAllah may Allah forgive you of your sins and give you that which is good for you. ameen.
July 19th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
brothers and sisters, my comment is not menat to be a charity case who’s feeling sorry for himself, but its a response to a previous comment who was looking for a real life example. i do seek forgiveness from Allah and people do make mistakes but its how we respond that counts. inshallah allah eases everybodies pain and difficult situation.
July 20th, 2008 at 5:28 am
Alima,
I’ll give you another real life example of when it went wrong.
I used to know this sister a long time ago who memorized the whole quran, wihtout going into a lot of the details, she fell in love with a brother, did some very haram things… ruined her reputation… it didnt work out.. she came back then married a christian guy.
and recently she told a sister I know that “she doesnt think she knows how to read Quran anymore.”
subhanallah it’s extremely scary. but that’s what can happen.
July 25th, 2008 at 8:04 pm
As salamu alaykum,
Ishq is a common sickness amoungst many Muslims especially the Youth. It’s an allure that taints many minds and leads to all sorts of haraam deeds. Subhan’Allah, the the most worrying thing is that it can happen to any one of us if we allow Shaytaan to enter our hearts.
I can mention to you many examples of how a Muslim may fall into these traps so that we are aware of its path. But I would like to focus on one particular way that can happen to us.
Because for us on this blog as Muslims who are aware of the hawaa we need to be extra careful. We are involved in da’wah work which includes interaction with sisters and brothers via email, blogs, forums, google groups and worst still in person. We can easily admire the piety, knowledge and manners of a muslim of the opposite sex. My brothers and sisters, of the four things we look for in a spouse number one is their deen. And Shaytaan can make us look at the deen of a person of the opposite sex, and say to you “She/He may be my potential”. Leading you to ‘monitor’ that individual only to allow shaytaan to seep into your heart and lead you to lowly desires.
Subhan’Allah, as Muslims we must continually renew ourselves, continually strengthen ourselves and continually be reminded.
ya Allah protect us from the many diseases of the heart. Ameen
July 25th, 2008 at 8:59 pm
Subhan’Allah, Shirien i only saw your example today. La haw la wala quwatta illa billah, now that is sooo scary…OMG!!! At times words cannot expess anything we feel!
“Our Lord! Let not our hearts deviate (from the truth) after You have guided us, and grant us mercy from You. Truly, You are the Bestower.” Surah al Imran 2/8
Y’nw your article has been a great reminder for me, meaning i know this stuff alHamdulillah but at times we’ve been practicing for so long and we’re just end up going with the flow. It’s good to be reminded, especially as we grow and the time approaches when we got to settle down, it’s reminders like these which bring you back to earth.
Bwt: I did this with my cousins, they enjoyed the topic and the real life examples were really helpful. May Allah strengthen them. Ameen.