Egyptian Gumbo

The following is a feature story I wrote last year. Until today, I continue to think about her story:

LSU custodian escapes bombs and lives to tell story

BATON ROUGE, La. - Oct. 18, 2007- To some, the rug in the living room is just for decoration. To others it’s there to keep their feet warm against the cold tiles. To Maryam Ghulam-Ali* it’s a constant reminder her terrifying past struggles.

She leaves for work everyday when her five kids come back from class. Some may see her inside the LSU engineering buildings cleaning after 3 p.m.

Most of those who see her would never be able to tell she lived what some would call a horror movie. Behind that big smile with dimpled cheeks, is a face of deep sadness for the past and fear for what the future holds.

Ghulam-Ali’s smile slowly faded as she began telling her story of her journey from war-torn Afghanistan to Baton Rouge, La.

She recalled when the Communist and the Taliban began fighting in the early 90s. “News started spreading that there was a group of so-called good Muslims that came to save us from the communist regime,” she said.

That is when the people of Afghanistan started to realize the same people they assumed would save them were the people they were now trying to escape from.

“There were bombs everywhere. A lot of people stealing things and the Taliban and Communist would kidnap girls and rape them,” she said.

“We always would hear how the girls would send letters home to tell their parents of their ware bouts, but the parents could never go to their daughters because of the danger involved in doing so.”

Ghulam-Ali’s husband always traveled on the road doing business. At the time when the bombing became more and more intense, she was nine months pregnant. Her husband tried to come back toward the end of her pregnancy term, but couldn’t because the roads were all blocked due to the fighting.

“One night around 7 p.m., I started to get intense stomach pains. I was so scared because I had no one with me. I only had my four young kids in a dark house,” she said.

She told her daughter, Malika Ghulam-Ali, who was only 5 years old at the time to run to the neighbor’s house and get help. Her neighbor came quickly knowing it could have something to do with her pregnancy.

“She was shocked and scared. She told me ‘Why now with all the bombs outside and the roads blocked without doctors?’ I was in so much pain at that time,” said Ghulam-Ali.

Luckily, her neighbor knew of a nurse that lived only two blocks away and hurried to go get her.

“She came with her supplies and a small lantern because of how dark it was. They put plastic under me and a blanket. The nurse gave me a shot, told me to walk for five minutes, and then I lied down and she pushed my stomach and the baby came out.”

Two days later, things got so bad for them in the city of Kabul, that a distant relative of her husband called and told them of their plan to escape to another state in Afghanistan.

Many of her family members had already escaped to Russia, India, Pakistan, and Iran.

“My husband was a business man. He used to drive trucks. So he was always away and we needed to try to escape,” she said.

The plan involved Ghulam-Ali and her four children at the time to walk to a bus station five miles away at the break of dawn to avoid anyone seeing them. It was there that they would meet with her husband’s distant relatives and escape to the state of Baghlam, Afghanistan.

“It was like walking from Wal-Mart on Siegen to the library on Blubonnet.”

Her children at that time were very young Malika ,5, her sister Tahmina ,4, their brother Mustafa ,2, and 3 days old Zahrafshan Ghulam-Ali accompanied their mom on the journey.

“I held Zahrafshan, while my three other kids walked. They were in pain from walking so much and it was extremely difficult but we had to leave. They walked slowly and cried a lot,” she said.

Two hours later they arrived at the bus station, bought their tickets and were on their way.

“We couldn’t take the main roads because they were blocked and too dangerous. So we escaped to Baghlam through the mountains. We went around the mountains until we got there,” She said.

Her family stayed in Baghlam for three years until they re-located to Pakistan because the fighting began to emerge there as well.

The month before they left for Pakistan, Maryam Ghulam-Ali, had her fifth child, Mugtabah.

“During that time, you had the Taliban telling everyone that for three days, no one should go outside or they will be killed. We couldn’t go get water, food or anything else.”

During those three days, it was the last time she heard from her husband. He was away on business and after that no one knew anything about him.

“We don’t know if he got killed or if he was kid-napped or what. We still don’t know if he is alive or not today,” she said.

With five children she had no time to deeply grieve. She just wanted to keep them safe. They escaped to Pakistan.

In Pakistan life was a little better. A local Mosque run by Iraqis took them in and found them an apartment to live in and found the kids jobs. For the next couple of months Malika, Tahmina, and Mustafa would make rugs for a living.

The kids would get trained and later became very skilled at making the rugs. “It was extremely hard work. I was only seven at that time. Malika was 11 years old and Tahmina was 10 years old,” said Mustafa.

“Because I was so young, our boss didn’t pay me. He only paid my sisters. That made me very angry and I went to complain but he hit me on my hands,” said Mustafa.

He went home and told his mother what happened and told her he wanted to quit. “I was so shocked that I went and took my other two kids home and they all quit their job,” Ghulam-Ali said. “We decided to make our own rug business and sell them, and that worked out.”

She pointed to the rugs they made on her living room floor. One was made of soft wool with a lot of calm cream and green colors, while the other was equally exquisite in its beauty.

“I cried a lot during that time because my kids had to work and couldn’t go to school. They also had to take off their shoes and use it as a pillow to sleep on,” she said.

“I don’t cry often, but when I remember some of the things we went through, I have to start crying,” added Mustafa.

It was in Pakistan, she was informed of the UN office. She went there seeking help. She had to take a series of interviews, including health exams for her and her children. At the end of the process they gave her tickets and passports to America.

“I cried so much that day. My kids didn’t know where we were going. And none of us knew English. But I was happy,” she said.

In August 2001 Ghulam-Ali and her five children arrived in Baton Rouge, La. Immigration officers moved her to a small apt. on Brightside Drive with only three spoons, one pillow, and a couch that wreaked so badly it make her children sick. The local mosque on West Chimes Street then stepped in and provided them with everything they needed.

Today, Ghulam-Ali’s five children are in school; the oldest two in college on scholarships, one in high school, and two in middle school. Three of her children have jobs on the side.

The family has an apartment fully furnished with beds for everyone to sleep on and they always come home to food on the table.

Ghulam-Ali will take her citizenship test for the second time this winter after failing the first time due to not knowing what it meant to have the right to bare arms. “I was confused I thought they were talking about bears -like the animal- and their arms,” she said laughingly.

*Not her real last name, so for the purpose of the article I gave her husband’s last name. This article is one year old.

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